Lean Against My Heart: Life with My Cello
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Lonely? Rent a Cello

8/27/2013

 
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I have lived in the Boston area for almost 20 years. In my experience, the general rule here is: Don't talk to strangers, ever. If you do attempt to greet people on the street, they will A) Ignore you B) Look at you as if you are crazy, or C) Immediately cross the street to get away from you. 

But rules are made to be broken. And people in the Greater Boston area will talk to you if and only if the following are true: 

1. You are holding a newborn. 
2. You have a puppy, or, even better, you are a puppy. 
3. You are one of those mimes dressed as a frozen Statue of Liberty in Harvard Square, and they are trying to get you to talk. 
4. You are attending a Red Sox, Patriots, Bruins, or Celtics game and/or you, like they, are slightly inebriated. 
5. We have just had a snowstorm. 
6. We have just experienced a tragedy like September 11th or the Boston Marathon bombings.
7. You are carrying or playing a guitar or a cello. 

I do not have a newborn. I do not have a puppy. I am not a puppy or a mime. I rarely attend professional sporting events, I don't drink, and it is August, so there is no snow on the ground. Until a few months ago, people around here rarely spoke to me.  But the first time I walked out of my house with a cello, my neighbor, whom I'd never spoken to before, said "Hello" as he walked by. I almost dropped my cello.  Later, as I headed to cello class, other strangers smiled at me. 


Recently, when leaving cello class very late at night, someone came up behind me and said, "What you got there?" I instantly thought the worst, and prepared to scream and/or run. Then I remembered that I was carrying a cello on my back, and I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. I told him that it was a cello, and he and I and his group of friends stood around in the dark and talked about how they play the cello too, and how much they love it. This happens everywhere I go now. 

So, if you are feeling lonely and you are not a puppy, or you don't have a puppy or a newborn to accompany you around town, and you have no interest in sports, internet dating or creepy Statue of Liberty mimes, rent a cello.* I guarantee that if you put it on your back and walk around with it for a few minutes, you will start meeting new people. You don't even have to learn to play it, but if you do, your social circle will increase exponentially, every other aspect of your life will improve, and you will never be bored or lonely again. 


*Johnson Strings


 

Baby On Board

8/20/2013

 
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Sadly, I do not have a baby. But I do have a cello, and the two are surprisingly similar. Here's how: 

1. Both might require the purchase of a new car or house to accommodate them.
2. Both might require taking on a second job so that you can afford the new house, the new car, the cello, cello lessons, and other baby-specific and cello-specific expenses. 
3. Both are made of all natural materials. 
4. Both should be transported carefully, in the back seat, with a seatbelt, and never in the trunk. 
5. Both are sensitive to temperature changes, and get cranky and out of tune if the temperature is not just right. 
6. Both elicit frequent comments from complete strangers. 
7. A cello is already the size of a small, rotund adult. A baby will most likely become a rotund adult. 
8. When traveling on an airplane or on a train, both sometimes require their own tickets. *See number 2. 

9. Both should be kept clean, free of dust, and away from harsh chemicals. 
10. Both have distinct voices. 
11. Both should be held close to your heart. 
12. Both should be carried very carefully to avoid nicks, cuts and bruises, which can and do appear if either of them gets caught in a door or hits their head on a pipe in the ceiling at a parking garage. 
13. Both of them should be adequately dressed or covered, especially when walking around outside. *See numbers 5, 9 and 12. 
14. Both are two of the most amazingly beautiful creations on earth. 
15. Both are desirable targets for thieves and/or kidnappers. *See number 14. 
16. At first, you will feel completely inept as the caretaker of either a baby or a cello. *See all of the above.
17. Your social circle will simultaneously expand and diminish as you meet new parents and other musicians, and lose friends who can't relate to your new obsessi
on with all-things-baby and/or all-things-cello. *See number 6. 
18. On some days you will feel frustrated and want to walk away from both, but you know that if you stick around, things will get better. *See number 16. 
19. Both challenge you to learn, say and do things you'd never thought possible.
20. The moment a cello or a baby enters your life, it will change forever, and you will wonder why you bothered to wait so long to welcome either one into your home. *See numbers 1, 2, 14 and 16. 



Operation Christmas Carol

8/15/2013

 
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An open letter to my landlord:

You might have noticed that I started playing an instrument a few months ago. In case it's not entirely clear what that instrument is, it's a cello. When played correctly, the cello is the most beautiful instrument I know of, and my goal is to learn to play it really well. That is why I am writing to let you know that you will be hearing Christmas carols every day, and sometimes multiple times a day, from now until December 23rd. Please don't kill me.

Operation Christmas Carol will begin with Jingle Bells, also known on the cello as: down bow F sharp, F sharp, F shaaarp, F sharp F sharp F shaaarp, F sharp, A, D, E, F shaaarp etc. Over the next few days or more, my rendition of Jingle Bells will sound less like Jing/Gle/Bells, Jing/Gle/Bells, and more like the version with which you are familiar. I promise.

I am not sure yet which Christmas carol is next on my agenda, because I still have to learn the notes, but I plan to also play Silent Night and Adeste Fidelis, which are my favorites.  I hope that as the time passes, you will begin to appreciate how my cello sounds less strangled and more joyful. Ideally, you might even sing along! If you have any Christmas requests, feel free to call me, and I'll be glad to oblige. Just be sure that you
request something that you really like, since you'll be hearing it repeatedly from now until December.

Operation Christmas Carol is important to my evolution as a cellist for a variety of reasons: Since I know what Christmas carols are supposed to sound like, I will know intuitively whether I am playing the notes  incorrectly, and will be able to correct my mistakes easily. Familiarity with the songs also means that when I play, my hands will be more relaxed, and the best cellists are relaxed cellists.

Thank you for your patience and understanding, and thank you for not evicting me during this not-so-undercover operation.  Learning the cello takes a lot of time and money. Lessons, rental fees, and cello accessories are expensive. Combined with other expenses, like rent, I will not be able to afford very many Christmas presents for my friends and family this year.  Operation Christmas Carol is my present for them. And for you. A little early. Merry Christmas!

Sincerely,

Alexa Kontes






Take the Wheel

8/12/2013

 
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For the past eight weeks, I've spent Tuesday evenings playing the cello with a small group of aspiring cellists. Most of our class time is devoted to playing together, which, in theory, is a wonderful experience, unless you are a beginning cellist with stage fright. In that case, playing the cello with others is like driving in a blizzard on a highway in the dark, with an injured toddler in the back seat. 

On the road, you must keep track of speed, your passengers, pedestrians, other motorists, bicyclists, etc. With a cello, you have to be mindful not only of the height, size and angle of your cello, but also the angle, pressure and position of your left hand on the fingerboard, and the angle, pressure and position of your right hand on the bow. And then, of course, you have to focus on the musical notes and other directives on the page in front of you: flat,  sharp, or natural, up bow or down bow, meter, rhythm, melody, bass line, tone etc. If you don't focus effectively on all of these things simultaneously, your cello will sound less like a cello and more like the chicken on life support that I mentioned in my first post. 

Because I don't want my cello to sound like a chicken on life support anymore,  I've been practicing the bass line to Pachelbel's Canon, the bass line to Beethoven's Russian Folk Song, Praetorius' Viva La Musica, and a folk song called White Sands and Grey Sands every day. I'm improving on all all of them except Viva La Musica, which is currently the bane of my existence. But no matter how much I improve on my own, I know that as soon as I start playing along with my classmates, I will panic, my bow hold will tighten, my hands will start hurting, I'll lose track of the notes, my cello will start squawking, and because I don't want to distract everyone else, I will stop playing. 

In an effort to overcome this anxiety, I am conducting an experiment. After I practice Pachelbel's Canon a few times by myself, I play the bass line along with an actual recording of Pachelbel's Canon. Later today, I will play the other songs mentioned above while simultaneously listening to Bach's Cello Suites. My goal is to encourage myself to keep playing even when I am distracted, and to turn that panicky driving-in-a-blizzard feeling into something less like fear and more like confidence and control.

So far, my experiment is not working very well, and I still get very distracted by the other sounds. But, to play the cello well, I have to learn to relax and be patient with myself, and I also have to learn to perform well with others.  As with anything else in life, I can't stop when things are difficult. If I want to get anywhere, I have to take the wheel and keep on going. 








The First Notes

8/6/2013

 
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Seven weeks ago, on June 25th, 2013, at the age of 41, I took my first cello lesson. That night, my teacher told me to lean the cello against my heart, and from that moment on, I was hooked. Playing the cello really is like interacting with another human being, and when I play, I forget everything else, particularly when a miracle occurs and I play the notes correctly. 

Playing the cello is not easy, especially for an adult beginner. I am still learning the bass clef, and I have a mild form of cerebral palsy which makes it hard to coordinate the muscles on the left side of my body. My fingers don't always do what I want them to do, and sometimes my left knee slides behind the cello instead of staying by its side. Apparently I also have inflexible wrists, and my bow hold is not as relaxed as it should be, but I am no longer in pain after I play, so I know that I am making progress. At the moment, eighth notes are my nemesis, so I pretend that they don't exist. 

After seven weeks of playing, I still sound like a chicken on life support, but patience is a virtue. My chicken has recently started breathing normally at around every third note. So far, I can play part of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star by heart. I can play something that more than vaguely resembles White Sands and Grey Sands, and I added Hot Cross Buns to my repertoire last night.

I started this blog as a way to keep me motivated when I get frustrated, and as a way to combine my two loves: writing and cello. I don't know exactly how this will evolve, but people seem interested in my experiences with the cello, so I thought I'd give blogging a try. When I am not practicing the cello, working, or volunteering, I write fiction. If you'd like to read some of my stories, see http://www.esmeraldasnest.com

Stay tuned (ha ha) for other posts on my adventures with the cello, such as How to Drive in a Traffic Jam With a Cello and Pray That You Don't Have to Stop Short, and more. 




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    Alexandra Kontes is a writer and a beginner cellist. To read some of her fiction, please see Esmeralda's Nest.



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Lean Against My Heart: Life With My Cello, copyright 2015, Alexandra N. Kontes

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